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Kids can make your life miserable when you are insisting that they do something you want them to do that they would rather avoid. You know what I mean. If you are in a hurry to go somewhere, Junior will throw a fit about wearing a particular shirt, or finishing a grilled cheese sandwich, even if that shirt or grilled cheese were his favorites up until this moment.
If you’re divorced, Junior’s reluctance can create even more problems for you. The court’s order clearly states that he has to visit his other parent at particular times. However, he doesn’t want to go, and he is going to make it as hard as he can, like he does every time it is time for him to go. Now what should you do? Is his tantrum a good reason to be in contempt of court? Before you answer yes to this question, remember what court ordered visitation is for, and what the judge is likely to do if you don’t follow his order.
In general, divorced people don’t play well with each other. Because of this, they ask a judge to set rules for them so that they will know what rights they have in a given situation. The judge has to have a way to enforce the rules he makes. Otherwise, people could regard court orders as mere suggestions, and could waste a lot of the court’s time rehashing issues that have already been decided.
When the issues being contested have to do with kids, courts have to be very careful about what they decide. States have laws to govern the relationships between parents and their children in the case of a divorce, and the judge’s order has to comply with what the state’s law makers have set out as fair. A judge can “deviate” from the general visitation requirements if there is a good reason. However, unless you can prove that the other parent’s contact with the child is somehow dangerous, the judge will stick to the guidelines the legislature has mandated. If you don’t stick to them as well, you could end up with a fine, or even a visit to jail.
It is generally held to be true that kids grow into healthier adults if they have relationships with both of their parents. Since both of you contributed to their genetic make-up, it is only logical that they need input from both of you to best understand who they are. Since the person they live with most of the time has the most influence on them, it is too easy to blame the other parent for a child’s reluctance to visit. This is why that it is in your best interest to make Junior eat his darn sandwich so he’ll be ready to go when Dad gets there to pick him up. Of course, the shirt is negotiable.
write by johnson