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Mobsters. You gotta love ’em! We all love those trench coat wearing, machinegun toting, gangsters from Brooklyn and Chicago that have captured our minds in many of the biggest grossing movies of all time like “Scarface” and “The Godfather” series.
These people have many things in common with ordinary folk like you and me. They drive nice cars, never seem to work, have big houses, a maid, a pool and even a pool boy. Does this sound familiar to you? Probably not! Imagine what it would be like if you looked like a mob boss!
Things would be different for you. First, you would get more respect! What does that mean really? Well, how about free coffee at the local diner? Maybe the deepest discount below invoice for your new Lexus. It’s possible that you would not get fined by the trash company for not recycling your garbage properly on pickup day. It’s also possible that you could get local municipal workers to come to your house and use county property and tax dollars to cut down and dispose of that giant tree in your backyard in exchange only for a lasagna buffet for all the workers who helped.
This sounds like a great life right? Just think: if you looked and acted like a mobster, you would get so many advantages from others. Is this utopia or is there a flip side? Could looking like a mobster be a bad thing? The answer, I’m afraid, is yes. Looking like a mobster can be detrimental to your health.
If you looked like a mobster, it is possible that someone could accidentally take a hit on your life. Maybe you would be “accidentally” run over by a truck while crossing the street to get your double espresso. The police would always find you suspicious and pull you over on the parkway for going six miles over the speed limit (I hate it when that happens). Looking like a mobster just may not be all that it is cracked up to be!
If you already look like a mobster, is it possible to change your appearance? Well what does a mobster look like? Let’s start from the top. First, a mobster would have greasy back hair with a widow’s peak. Second, he would have dark eye bags and circles under and around his dark brown eyes. He would often cover these up with shades to avoid looking like a mobster, which makes him look more like a mobster!
Thirdly, a big nose (a mobster just has to have one of those!). Next, lots of gold jewelry and a hairy chest to display it on. Finally, if you look like a mobster, you would have the proper outfit including impeccable shoes, matching belt, slacks and a trench coat. Can we change you to look more like ordinary folk? You bet!
First, shave your head. It is a fact that there are no 100 percent bald mobsters. Additionally, if you have a beard or an evil goatee, shave that as well. For your eyes, revitalize them with Eyederma. Use it and lose those dark circles and eye bags. You’ll look younger, less tired and less like a mobster.
write by Lagan